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Bag Full o' Spoons

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They're good for your heart Apr. 6th, 2012 @ 09:12 pm
I now have two cookbooks on how to prepare dishes and beverages with Coke. The 125th anniversary one contains a recipe called "Uncle Joe's Baked Beans." Every time I see it all I can think of is this:

Twisted Alternate History

Past Self: Good morning, Supreme Leader!
Uncle Joe: Good morning, Comrade. What do you have there?
Past Self: Tasty and nutritious tuna fish!

Past Self: Good morning, Supreme Leader!
Uncle Joe: Good morning, Comrade. What do you have there?
Past Self: Healthy and delicious baked beans!
Uncle Joe: Give that here... *chomp chomp*
Past Self: But I brought that from home...
Uncle Joe: WHAT YOU SAY?!?

If I had a past life in the USSR, that might have been how it ended.
Okay, not funny.

Wait, THIS is funny. Foolish little brother started getting me into the series...
(I know, I know, it's sort of late. :P)
Current Mood: uncomfortableuncomfortable
Current Music: depressing documentary about cute little bats dying horribly

I GOTS AN IPHONE Mar. 29th, 2012 @ 04:59 pm
The old one quit working for some reason -I couldn't use the keyboard or turn the volume up or down without having to smack the thing first. So after it turned itself off when I needed an alarm I spoke to Dad and he suggested I try a smartphone. (I also like playing Angry Birds on his so now he can have it back while I play on my own device XD)

Now I need to find a case.

(Right before we went to get the new phone I accidentally dropped the old one and found it worked perfectly again. Go figure. I told Mom and she agrees it sounds like something from a TV show. Still, the next time I drop it could break it forever, so we still got the new one.)
Current Mood: satisfiedsatisfied
Current Music: just noise

DADDY, THE CHAMPION OF THE WORLD Feb. 13th, 2012 @ 07:41 pm
Today I went to Dad's house to pick up some stuff to work on before MomoCon. After looking around for a few minutes, he told me he must've thrown it out without checking to see what it was. Normally I could understand that, but never mind that you could feel five pounds of clothing when you picked up the bag. Never mind that although he claimed to have been cleaning, most of the house still looked like a war zone. Never mind that none of foolish little brother's stuff was missing.

I have no idea what sort of cosplay I can throw together in 30 days. Part of me wants to contact the con officials and just get my money back.

I have books of profanity in Japanese, Russian and German, and I know some dirty words in Spanish, French and Chinese, but none of them can describe how I feel right now.
Current Mood: infuriatedNO WORDS
Current Music: BAD THOUGHTS

SEX IS EVIL AND I AM... UNAPPEALING Sep. 26th, 2011 @ 07:02 pm

Stupid DNA.

The following rant drips with frustration and the language that often goes with it and therefore shouldn't be read at work. Come to think of it, this is nothing but me feeling sorry for myself so maybe it shouldn't be read period. Boy, is it good to vent.Collapse )
Current Mood: frustratedfrustrated
Current Music: Limp Bizkit "Break Stuff" (and some news, that never helps my mood)

WHY DIDN'T ANYBODY TELL -wait, I think somebody may have at some point Sep. 16th, 2011 @ 09:32 pm
So this morning we were serving Mr. Pibb to panelists to see if they could detect a large difference in the stuff you normally get out of the vending machine and the stuff that we were testing. One of the checklist items was "check taste" and I did, and that stuff is good! It smells like (pleasant) herbal medicine and tastes like... ah, I don't know. I haven't enjoyed a test this much since we were testing that lemon cola and they gave us way too much and they told me I could drink as much as I wanted from what was left.^^ I can't believe I've never had this before.

Oh! New Star Wars: The Clone Wars finally came on after a lightsaber-action-less summer. Dude. So worth the wait. "Water War"/"Gungan Attack" (despite the Gungans it was still epic) Ackbar fighting robots underwater, half-monster/half-machine giant jellyfish. The everything. Dat scenery. Dem mechas. DUDE.

Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: Milky Way "Anataboshi"
Other entries
» It was a good week
So this week was my first official one at Coca-Cola.

Bad points: Gotta get up at 4:45, take two buses. Get off at 3, but catch first bus at 3:31, second at 4:15, get home at 5:30, and that's if traffic's moving. To get 7 hours of sleep I gotta go to bed by 9:45 *checks clock* crap, I oughta be sleeping now.

Good points: It's challenging enough in the taste test lab, my coworkers are smart and friendly (finally met Ms. E, she's a very nice lady), I get paid good, there's vending machines full of free drinks all over the three buildings, AND THE FOOD IS EPIC!
I've had nothing else to say about the recent job offer. I wound up working for two days, then was told the next week was a second-phase interview for the second person they were examining, and the week after was the interview period for the third and final person. I did not actually get to meet Ms. E, and for all that time I heard from no one, though I was sure I did pretty well.

But today... wait *checks clock* yesterday I got a phone call from Ms. E, and she says they'd narrowed it down to two people and they want me back! Come Monday my cashflow will resume! :D
» (No Subject)
So I try to follow the news every day no matter how bad it is (I'm tired of Iran, bored with the tea party and God knows how sick I am of whichever talent-less celebutard the magazines are pushing any given month; short of personal memories I feel I'll have nothing to share with my foolish little brother's grandchildren) and I read the depressing articles about the East African food shortage and I know that's not really a new issue, but in a recent paper I saw they've got this special peanut butter out for starving kids. And I know that working on special foods isn't that new either, and situations like this need more permanent solutions than just passing out more food (for those about to snark, I've already found a doctor who will fix me without a patronizing "you'll change your mind because you're stupid and don't know what you want" lecture), but for some reason something about this really bugs me. We've got something that can help tide these folks over while work gets done on whatever needs to be set up, or changed, in the country, and we can't even get it to the people who really need it because either some nutjob militia or corrupt official keeps taking it. No matter what I try to send over there it won't reach the people I want it to, and I hate that. I don't even have the words to properly describe this. You the reader are probably not one of the people I'd like to break this chair over, but if you are I want you to know that I hope you choke to death on your stolen breakfast and they use your bloated carcass to fertilize their crops. And if you're one of those crazy bastards who say it's better to starve than accept help from the West, then you need to hurry up and do it, and stop dragging your neighbors down with you.

Gaaaaah I want to bite something.
» I gave myself very good advice... "AIM!"
Today I finally beat Edward at bowling, 158 to 137. YAAAY!

Last night/this morning I had about three disturbing dreams about missing AWA with half a costume, so today I finished that darn scarf. It's about 8.5 feet.

Alice in Wonderland (the 1958 version) came on today. I only saw part of it, but I forgot how... er, whimsical it was. Good times.

And this actually happened Friday, but I ordered a Morgan Silver Dollar in the mail and it showed up, 90% silver, in such great condition (Brilliant Uncirculated) that the lady's hair and the eagle's feathers and everything else show up in perfect detail. The only marks are bagmarks, which come from the coins bumping and scraping against each other in the bag. :D
» Moth stalemate, job win
No, I haven't found and killed the blasted thing yet. I keep going through my closet...

At first I wasn't going to say anything about the interview, because I had prepared but when I left I was consumed by thoughts such as "just how awkward was I? Did I give the best answers?" Then today I got a call from the helpful lady who's been a sort of go-between for me and local chemistry jobs for a while (I'll call her Ms. E), and she says the man who led the interview wants me to report to the lab Monday. I'll work there for three days, then he'll de-brief me and decide whether to keep me around for a while. I'm excited, I'm gonna do my best! And Ms. E has told me her office isn't too far away from the place where I report, so on Monday we'll finally meet face to face. It'll be kind of like the ending of Jumping Jack Flash, except she's not British and nobody's tried to kill us.
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